The idea that the meal transcended the boundary between the author and her waitress was the interesting one. I liked the descriptions of sprawling Beijing but I felt as if too much time was spent on her annoyance in the taxi. If she had just focused on the look and feel of Beijing I would have liked it more. I also enjoyed the description of the food as bits of broken bone. The boyfriend's reaction was also amusing. I didn't like when she alludes that she only felt unsafe once. It lead to questions, about where else she went. Why she felt safe? Was it just because of this meal or something else? The ending was kind of abrupt for me but I liked the overall framing of a meal helping to cross language and cultural barriers.
I felt as if the Greek piece was better than the Beijing article. The idea of something remote being inherently beautiful was a great concept. The concept did get lost momentarily when the author was describing his trip and how he ended up in Greece. I felt as if the description of all of the people on the Island could be cut down. Only the couple he went to the cave with was important to me. The others just faded into the background. I felt as if the information about the World Cup kind of distracted from the main message but I liked that he managed to tie it back in at the end. I wanted more description of the place. I understand the panic of the entire situation but was the remoteness really that beautiful? Or was it just scary as he sums up at the end? I enjoyed the journey but I was left with questions at the end of the piece. I liked that the author went to visit the couple and tied them into the end. I just wanted more focus on the idea of remoteness and beauty as I read through the piece. I did, however, enjoy it.
While both of these pieces took unusual angles on their respective locations, I felt unsure of both of their angles. That being said, I did think the Greece article had a relatively strong narrative, whereas the Beijing article was a little less clear as to what was being communicated.
The Greece article contained really interesting details, not only about the place he was writing about, but the surrounding islands. I particularly liked the note that Naxos was well-known for being where Thesus abandoned Ariadne. I definitely learned something from the piece, even though it was ultimately more personal than travel-oriented. I did feel the conclusion was a let-down and didn't really emphasize the angle at all. The story, though, was very fun and compelling enough.
As for the Beijing article, I thought it was lacking in a general direction. There were moments of connection and interest, of course, but there wasn't much of an over-arching theme, which left me wondering why exactly I was reading it. It almost felt as though there should have been more to it, either in the article, or as a series of articles. It just seemed incomplete, and therefore, unsatisfying to read.
The first article had an interesting premise but failed to live up to its promise. While the broken-bone dish was interesting, the reader is never informed what it actually is; the writer never researched it or inquired about it, leaving the readers to smile and shrug at yet another unidentified foreign dish. Neither does the writer spend time on her own food, even though the article is apparently about her first meal in Beijing. The so-called connection seems contrived. More likely the waitress was thinking "White people can't handle this." The description of the hotel's area and the urbanity was nice, but we also never learn what hotel the couple stays at after the first night. Maybe it doesn't matter, but this means the hotel detail doesn't matter in the first place.
As with the previous set of articles, the Greek article is superior because the writing is more personal. While staying distanced from his subject, the writer adds humor to the situations, especially his description of going into survival mode which I and probably many others have experienced, albeit in less dangerous circumstances. I do wish the writer had provided more closure on the leg-issue, since we never find out exactly what was wrong with it and instead are told about disability check amounts compared cross-country.
The Greece one was particularly interesting for a few reasons. I was super duper into it from the get-go because I love Greece and the idea of it-- but also because of the piece's initial set up. The part about it NOT being the neighboring town made this one so much more fascinating. That, however, was as far as my interest went. It suddenly got so disjointed, jumpy and I didn't really find much of an angle other than a possible one involving isolation. The bits about the World Cup did little for other than place it in time. It was well written, I just finished (abruptly, I may add) and had no idea what to take from it.
The Beijing article was good. I wish there was a little more focus in it. I expected it to be far longer than it was, but I loved the ending. The ending was simply short, sweet but perfect. That being said, I do agree with Jes, if the piece is going to be that short, too much time is wasted on the Hotel and Airport. I did really like it though, the scene in the restaurant is really well done. And this one, unlike Greece, actually had a really clear, discernable message for me to take at the end.
Like the comments above, I found the piece about Greece to have the best angle. I really enjoyed the inclusion of the quote about people wanting to find deserted places - he hit the nail on the head there. I did, however, begin to get bored while reading it. I felt like it dragged on a bit in certain areas, such as when he explained how he got to Greece. I just wanted him to get to the story and to the place that the heading called "mysterious." As for the article on Beijing, I simply could not get into it and I was actually surprised it had won an award. I wasn't too sure what her concrete angle was. Was it about a restaurant experience? Her journey around Beijing? Her relatives whom she brought up randomly? Or the fact that some areas of the city are unsafe? It moved around too much and considering it was such a short piece, I would have preferred if she would have stuck to just talking about the restaurant and the food. I wanted to know more about the food, the prices, and the decor of the place. THAT would have been engaging. -Elizabeth Nash
In the Beijing piece, I was struggling to find its angle. At first, it seemed like it was about trying traditional Asian food for the first time, but then the author ends the piece with the line about the foolishness of men (which I found to be sexist, even if I am a woman). I was bored while reading the part about the taxi driver bringing the author and her boyfriend to the wrong hotel (something I should have ignored in my last piece. Tediousness indeed is not entertaining). I thought that the author lost focus during the piece, but alternated between the past and present tense well.
In the Greece piece, I appreciated the excerpt about Greek mythology and the Don DeLillo quote and how the author backed those pieces of information up. I lost interest when the author described his travel companions and found that information to be unnecessary. I found myself skimming the rest of the piece halfway through reading, because it was getting wordy and the author was including too much information. This article should have just focused on the cave instead of the background about his other travels and the World Cup. I understand that the author wanted to give context, but the angle got to be unclear.
I thought that both piece were really interesting, but that both pieces could have been told a little better than they were.
In the Beijing piece, I enjoyed the fact that the author was writing through the lens of a tired traveler (which, of course, we have all been at one point). I thought that by doing that, the author was making the story more relatable and therefore easier for the reader to get into. She made the point herself that Beijing is a place very foreign to us, and she wrote about it in a way that was understandable for the reader. On the other hand, though, by doing this the author lost the chance to really make Beijing stand out. The experience she had was nothing I would consider to be strictly "Beijing".
The Greece piece I enjoyed for completely opposite reasons. I liked that the experience was completely unique to the author. I also liked that the place written about was so unusual. My biggest issue with the Greece piece was that it revolved so strictly around the author and his particular experience. I would have loved to read more about the caves and less about the accident.
I was very excited to read the Beijing article when I read the intro in the first article. However, it immediately steered in a different direction, and I had no idea what the angle was. The addition at the end of the idea of bonding over food and being a woman felt tacked on, and if the taxi ride was supposed to indicate something about how tired they felt, I didn't see the point.
In the Greek article, the first sentence had too many clauses. I had the same problem with this one as I did with the Beijing article--I wasn't sure what the angle was. There was too much irrelevant information in the first half, and though it seemed to be stated in the last line, I didn't get the full impact of the idea that "paradise can be dangerous". Obviously Steve got hurt, but that's something that can happen anywhere, and I wasn't sure what--or if--he'd learned from the experience.
I think that Beijing piece had the potential to be far more interesting than it was. The angle is hard to discover, as it goes from exhausted traveler to attempting local cuisine to her boyfriends' ego. I felt that if she had expanded on the way food was able to provide a different kind of experience and allowed for everyone in the restaurant to understand the scene despite a language barrier. In addition I liked how the HIlton was portrayed as the most unsafe they felt the entire trip and that is an angle that could have also worked really well, portraying the familiar as unsafe.
I definitely liked the Greek piece, but that was more because of the Don DiLillo quotes than the actual content. This piece definitely had a lot more drama and tension to it than the Beijing article but it didn't necessarily sell the islands to me. I think that if there was more expansion on their surroundings on the mountain and the differences between this remote, un-mythological island as compared to the bigger tourist destinations, like Santorini, that are designed to look perfect. However, I think that this piece was more successful in finding an angle and sticking to it with a creative use of literature quotes.
I liked the premise of the Beijing piece, but its angle appeared too late. From what I read, the author intended to convey a traveler's struggle for common ground in China (with an added language barrier). This obstacle appeared to be overcome during her meal with her boyfriend, but was unfortunately preceded by paragraphs devoted to unnecessary information: their taxi ride, the comfortableness of their Hilton hotel room. Given that the meal is where the action is, where the author crosses cultures to share a moment with their waitress, I would have liked that event to be the focus -- heard more details about the food, the restaurant, the people in it.
The Greece piece, though interesting, underwhelmed me. I loved the premise of finding a "beautiful, sacred, hard-to-reach" place in Greece; if that's what you want to find, Greece is the place to do it. The piece spends too much time listing, though: "that night," "a couple of days later," "after a while," "the next day," etc. Because I expected the piece to be about his search for this special place -- which he hopes to be the cave reachable only by hike -- I would have liked to see the piece start there. It doesn't matter that the exploration of the cave ends unexpectedly. That isn't a problem. In fact, it's interesting. But the moment is lost under descriptions of the people in his travel group who are mentioned only once or twice, European soccer, and other moments that don't contribute to the quote he gives his readers. Like the Beijing piece, Saltzstein's could benefit from more focus.
The Beijing piece was too short. It interested me, but like Ali mentioned, the angle came entirely too late. I would have liked to have seen more description in the piece. When description did appear, it was good, like the taxi ride, sitting in "unwashed sweat" or however the writer put it. I wasn't crazy about the way the restaurant scene was done. I see the language barrier and all, but really feel like it gave nothing to the piece. I would have rather read more about being lost in this taxi and being taken to the wrong hotel. How much did the taxi ride cost them? Where were they planning to stay after their one night at the Hilton? She says "this was the only time I'd feel unsafe in China" at one point. Really? What do you mean by that. I feel this piece needed a lot more of elaboration.
I loved the Greece piece. It was a bit long, but the story was amazing. I could feel his fear when his newly found friend fell and for that split second he thought for sure he was dead. I could feel his head rushing, what should I do, what will I tell his wife. I feel like he did a good job telling the story and describing the people. I love how the reader felt like they almost knew each character. While it was a little long, the writer did a good job conveying a lot of things in a relatively short space. I liked how there was a follow up at the end and how he talked about his other travels.
The idea that the meal transcended the boundary between the author and her waitress was the interesting one. I liked the descriptions of sprawling Beijing but I felt as if too much time was spent on her annoyance in the taxi. If she had just focused on the look and feel of Beijing I would have liked it more. I also enjoyed the description of the food as bits of broken bone. The boyfriend's reaction was also amusing. I didn't like when she alludes that she only felt unsafe once. It lead to questions, about where else she went. Why she felt safe? Was it just because of this meal or something else? The ending was kind of abrupt for me but I liked the overall framing of a meal helping to cross language and cultural barriers.
ReplyDeleteI felt as if the Greek piece was better than the Beijing article. The idea of something remote being inherently beautiful was a great concept. The concept did get lost momentarily when the author was describing his trip and how he ended up in Greece. I felt as if the description of all of the people on the Island could be cut down. Only the couple he went to the cave with was important to me. The others just faded into the background. I felt as if the information about the World Cup kind of distracted from the main message but I liked that he managed to tie it back in at the end. I wanted more description of the place. I understand the panic of the entire situation but was the remoteness really that beautiful? Or was it just scary as he sums up at the end? I enjoyed the journey but I was left with questions at the end of the piece. I liked that the author went to visit the couple and tied them into the end. I just wanted more focus on the idea of remoteness and beauty as I read through the piece. I did, however, enjoy it.
While both of these pieces took unusual angles on their respective locations, I felt unsure of both of their angles. That being said, I did think the Greece article had a relatively strong narrative, whereas the Beijing article was a little less clear as to what was being communicated.
ReplyDeleteThe Greece article contained really interesting details, not only about the place he was writing about, but the surrounding islands. I particularly liked the note that Naxos was well-known for being where Thesus abandoned Ariadne. I definitely learned something from the piece, even though it was ultimately more personal than travel-oriented. I did feel the conclusion was a let-down and didn't really emphasize the angle at all. The story, though, was very fun and compelling enough.
As for the Beijing article, I thought it was lacking in a general direction. There were moments of connection and interest, of course, but there wasn't much of an over-arching theme, which left me wondering why exactly I was reading it. It almost felt as though there should have been more to it, either in the article, or as a series of articles. It just seemed incomplete, and therefore, unsatisfying to read.
The first article had an interesting premise but failed to live up to its promise. While the broken-bone dish was interesting, the reader is never informed what it actually is; the writer never researched it or inquired about it, leaving the readers to smile and shrug at yet another unidentified foreign dish. Neither does the writer spend time on her own food, even though the article is apparently about her first meal in Beijing. The so-called connection seems contrived. More likely the waitress was thinking "White people can't handle this." The description of the hotel's area and the urbanity was nice, but we also never learn what hotel the couple stays at after the first night. Maybe it doesn't matter, but this means the hotel detail doesn't matter in the first place.
ReplyDeleteAs with the previous set of articles, the Greek article is superior because the writing is more personal. While staying distanced from his subject, the writer adds humor to the situations, especially his description of going into survival mode which I and probably many others have experienced, albeit in less dangerous circumstances. I do wish the writer had provided more closure on the leg-issue, since we never find out exactly what was wrong with it and instead are told about disability check amounts compared cross-country.
The Greece one was particularly interesting for a few reasons. I was super duper into it from the get-go because I love Greece and the idea of it-- but also because of the piece's initial set up. The part about it NOT being the neighboring town made this one so much more fascinating. That, however, was as far as my interest went. It suddenly got so disjointed, jumpy and I didn't really find much of an angle other than a possible one involving isolation. The bits about the World Cup did little for other than place it in time. It was well written, I just finished (abruptly, I may add) and had no idea what to take from it.
ReplyDeleteThe Beijing article was good. I wish there was a little more focus in it. I expected it to be far longer than it was, but I loved the ending. The ending was simply short, sweet but perfect. That being said, I do agree with Jes, if the piece is going to be that short, too much time is wasted on the Hotel and Airport. I did really like it though, the scene in the restaurant is really well done. And this one, unlike Greece, actually had a really clear, discernable message for me to take at the end.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteLike the comments above, I found the piece about Greece to have the best angle. I really enjoyed the inclusion of the quote about people wanting to find deserted places - he hit the nail on the head there. I did, however, begin to get bored while reading it. I felt like it dragged on a bit in certain areas, such as when he explained how he got to Greece. I just wanted him to get to the story and to the place that the heading called "mysterious." As for the article on Beijing, I simply could not get into it and I was actually surprised it had won an award. I wasn't too sure what her concrete angle was. Was it about a restaurant experience? Her journey around Beijing? Her relatives whom she brought up randomly? Or the fact that some areas of the city are unsafe? It moved around too much and considering it was such a short piece, I would have preferred if she would have stuck to just talking about the restaurant and the food. I wanted to know more about the food, the prices, and the decor of the place. THAT would have been engaging. -Elizabeth Nash
ReplyDeleteIn the Beijing piece, I was struggling to find its angle. At first, it seemed like it was about trying traditional Asian food for the first time, but then the author ends the piece with the line about the foolishness of men (which I found to be sexist, even if I am a woman). I was bored while reading the part about the taxi driver bringing the author and her boyfriend to the wrong hotel (something I should have ignored in my last piece. Tediousness indeed is not entertaining). I thought that the author lost focus during the piece, but alternated between the past and present tense well.
ReplyDeleteIn the Greece piece, I appreciated the excerpt about Greek mythology and the Don DeLillo quote and how the author backed those pieces of information up. I lost interest when the author described his travel companions and found that information to be unnecessary. I found myself skimming the rest of the piece halfway through reading, because it was getting wordy and the author was including too much information. This article should have just focused on the cave instead of the background about his other travels and the World Cup. I understand that the author wanted to give context, but the angle got to be unclear.
I thought that both piece were really interesting, but that both pieces could have been told a little better than they were.
ReplyDeleteIn the Beijing piece, I enjoyed the fact that the author was writing through the lens of a tired traveler (which, of course, we have all been at one point). I thought that by doing that, the author was making the story more relatable and therefore easier for the reader to get into. She made the point herself that Beijing is a place very foreign to us, and she wrote about it in a way that was understandable for the reader. On the other hand, though, by doing this the author lost the chance to really make Beijing stand out. The experience she had was nothing I would consider to be strictly "Beijing".
The Greece piece I enjoyed for completely opposite reasons. I liked that the experience was completely unique to the author. I also liked that the place written about was so unusual. My biggest issue with the Greece piece was that it revolved so strictly around the author and his particular experience. I would have loved to read more about the caves and less about the accident.
I was very excited to read the Beijing article when I read the intro in the first article. However, it immediately steered in a different direction, and I had no idea what the angle was. The addition at the end of the idea of bonding over food and being a woman felt tacked on, and if the taxi ride was supposed to indicate something about how tired they felt, I didn't see the point.
ReplyDeleteIn the Greek article, the first sentence had too many clauses. I had the same problem with this one as I did with the Beijing article--I wasn't sure what the angle was. There was too much irrelevant information in the first half, and though it seemed to be stated in the last line, I didn't get the full impact of the idea that "paradise can be dangerous". Obviously Steve got hurt, but that's something that can happen anywhere, and I wasn't sure what--or if--he'd learned from the experience.
I think that Beijing piece had the potential to be far more interesting than it was. The angle is hard to discover, as it goes from exhausted traveler to attempting local cuisine to her boyfriends' ego. I felt that if she had expanded on the way food was able to provide a different kind of experience and allowed for everyone in the restaurant to understand the scene despite a language barrier. In addition I liked how the HIlton was portrayed as the most unsafe they felt the entire trip and that is an angle that could have also worked really well, portraying the familiar as unsafe.
ReplyDeleteI definitely liked the Greek piece, but that was more because of the Don DiLillo quotes than the actual content. This piece definitely had a lot more drama and tension to it than the Beijing article but it didn't necessarily sell the islands to me. I think that if there was more expansion on their surroundings on the mountain and the differences between this remote, un-mythological island as compared to the bigger tourist destinations, like Santorini, that are designed to look perfect. However, I think that this piece was more successful in finding an angle and sticking to it with a creative use of literature quotes.
I liked the premise of the Beijing piece, but its angle appeared too late. From what I read, the author intended to convey a traveler's struggle for common ground in China (with an added language barrier). This obstacle appeared to be overcome during her meal with her boyfriend, but was unfortunately preceded by paragraphs devoted to unnecessary information: their taxi ride, the comfortableness of their Hilton hotel room. Given that the meal is where the action is, where the author crosses cultures to share a moment with their waitress, I would have liked that event to be the focus -- heard more details about the food, the restaurant, the people in it.
ReplyDeleteThe Greece piece, though interesting, underwhelmed me. I loved the premise of finding a "beautiful, sacred, hard-to-reach" place in Greece; if that's what you want to find, Greece is the place to do it. The piece spends too much time listing, though: "that night," "a couple of days later," "after a while," "the next day," etc. Because I expected the piece to be about his search for this special place -- which he hopes to be the cave reachable only by hike -- I would have liked to see the piece start there. It doesn't matter that the exploration of the cave ends unexpectedly. That isn't a problem. In fact, it's interesting. But the moment is lost under descriptions of the people in his travel group who are mentioned only once or twice, European soccer, and other moments that don't contribute to the quote he gives his readers. Like the Beijing piece, Saltzstein's could benefit from more focus.
The Beijing piece was too short. It interested me, but like Ali mentioned, the angle came entirely too late. I would have liked to have seen more description in the piece. When description did appear, it was good, like the taxi ride, sitting in "unwashed sweat" or however the writer put it. I wasn't crazy about the way the restaurant scene was done. I see the language barrier and all, but really feel like it gave nothing to the piece. I would have rather read more about being lost in this taxi and being taken to the wrong hotel. How much did the taxi ride cost them? Where were they planning to stay after their one night at the Hilton? She says "this was the only time I'd feel unsafe in China" at one point. Really? What do you mean by that. I feel this piece needed a lot more of elaboration.
ReplyDeleteI loved the Greece piece. It was a bit long, but the story was amazing. I could feel his fear when his newly found friend fell and for that split second he thought for sure he was dead. I could feel his head rushing, what should I do, what will I tell his wife. I feel like he did a good job telling the story and describing the people. I love how the reader felt like they almost knew each character. While it was a little long, the writer did a good job conveying a lot of things in a relatively short space. I liked how there was a follow up at the end and how he talked about his other travels.